Tuesday

Things that drive me nuts, clotheswise

People always ask me to dress them or to give them tips. I basically tell them not to wear any of this and they'll be fine. click pictures for big. Although you don't really want to see any of these clothes bigger than you have to. trust.

1. WHATEVER THIS IS CALLED.
I don't know where this trend came from but it came in quiet and deadly like wave of Anthrax. Only more deadly.




2. Square necks.
This cut just makes me uncomfortable. to wear AND to look at. Sesame Street your shirts. If the neck isn't brought to you by the letter V or the letter U then don't even try.




3. Empire Cut
I am totally baffled by the popularity of this. I mean, it's SO unflattering, It makes everyone look top-heavy and, in turn, much bigger overall than they are. MAYBE I'm biased because I like girls to look like 12 year old boys. I don't know. Whatever. I don't think anyone should want to rock a look that is like shoulder pads for your chest.



4. Unnecessary Smocking
This is my biggest pet peeve. The smocking always bunches UP and moves UP, which means people who wear it constantly are pulling it DOWN. Plus, usually clothing manufacturers include smocking at the worst places. Also, smocking is ugly as sin.

*NOTE, whenever a shirt I like has this crap, I sit with scissors and cut the elastic out. It takes forever.



5. Random Waist Cinching.
If you absolutely NEED a cinch (hint: YOU DON'T), use a belt. This just makes it look like your shirt is tucked into your underwear.



6. Black Lace
This is admittedly less aesthetically horrid than the other trends. But it makes me think of really really tan girls with extensions and a lot of makeup. Which, if that's your thing, COOL, but I'm not a fan.



7. Ugly scarves with ugly fringe
I don't like the whole "bunch it in a triangle around the neck" look. It makes people look like they are suffocating. Then I feel like I'm suffocating. Either way there's just a lack of oxygen all around.



8. This horrid blue color
I just hate this color. I don't even know what this color is called. But, like, even the Smurfs are a better shade of blue. The only thing that makes this color worse is when it's combined with jersey fabric.



8. Kimono cut
I know a lot of people like this, I just don't know why. It basically eliminates the torso. It's also basically a combo of the empire triangle fiasco (#3) and the unnecessary cinching (#5)




9. Weird boob wrinkles
If you don't know why this is horrible, then there's really no help for you.



*pictures from Forever 21.com. Unfortunately for them.

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